Taurus - The BULL!!

A Taurean in every sense ..... I happily announce myself to be a Bull :-D .. here are some reasons why.....

Zodiac Symbol:	Bull
Birth Dates (Tropical):	April 20 - May 20
Birth Dates (Sidereal):	May 15 - June 16
Birth Dates (Solar):	May 14 - June 19
Constellation:	Taurus
Zodiac Element:	Earth
Zodiac Quality:	Fixed
Domicile:	Venus
Detriment:	Mars(ancient)/ Pluto(modern)
Exaltation:	Moon
Fall:	Uranus
Numbers:	Four
Day:	Thursday

The second sign in Zodiac. Taurus is classed as a Negative or feminine, introverted sign; its Element is Earth and its Quality is Fixed. Traditionally ruled by the planet Venus. The opposite sign to Taurus is Scorpio. Taurus is occupied by Sun from April 20 to May 20

Characteristics:
Positive Traits: (I won't say much... I dont want to praise myself :-D)

discipline (uhh... i try) hard-working good sense-of-humor (outrageous!!) prudent great work-ethic artistic ( i love doing crazy things) loving (very) romantic (ahem!) sensual sexual attentive comforting strong steady

shy (hee hee... very rare!) organized (under normal conditions) cautious harmonious trustworthy calm tenacious stable patient resourceful easygoing ( lazy! ) careful dependable (when i want to be) honest

Negative Traits:

controlling(nooo.... maybe a little :-D) stubborn(ohhhh I love that!!) hyper-sensitive gets stuck in ruts, little to say (hee hee Chatter Box!! infact it should be in my positive trait or something!! ) resentful angry(not very true) moody(which I so am)

aggressive (nah!!) ultra-conservative (phbbtt!!) horrible temper (only when made to) possessive (neveerr!!) insecure (not true!!) Jealous (yeah right!!) materialistic (hee hee.. I am) overly self-conscious (not overly but true) Vengeful (not really)

Attributes:
Ideal Careers: Banking, Architecture, Building, Almost any form of Bureaucracy, Auctioneering, Farming, Medicine, Vetinary, Chemistry, Managers, Singers, Chef and Acting. ( I can pretty much do the last four things with good perfection :-D Wonder sometimes that I should have gone for acting ... as it is I'm a big Nauntanki :-D)

Likes: Stability, Being attracted, natural things, time to ponder, comfort, humor, honesty and pleasure.

Dislikes: Disruption, Being jealous, Being pushed too hard, Synthetic, Being rushed.
Associations:
BirthStones : Diamond, Emerald (no wonder I have such an expensive taste for things ;-) )
Colors: Mauve, Pale Blue
Gemstones: Emerald
Metal: Copper

Destiny governed by Fate or Faith???

An Abstract from "Arrow of the Blue Skinned God" - Jonah Blank

""Perhaps", I ventured, "fate is a Borgesian labyrinth. We are perfectly free to wander through it at will, but the paths we treat are wholly determined by the walls of the maze. We can select any route we please, even change routes from time to time, but we still must follow the corridors wherever they may lead."

"Yes indeed," said the whistler, " If every road went where we desired, each of us would be a big movie star"

"But", his friend addressed me earnestly, " we do not all have the same destiny."

"Quite true," U said, "the maze is different for every person."

"Why not break through the walls?" said the whistler

"Cannot be done," said his friend. "No way to alter fate, you know that. The walls of this maze," he said, "must be made of cast iron."

"- We cannot see the goals but we can't just step forward and reach them. We can't get there by a straight course - if we try we hit our nose on the thin air. We become angry and frustrated, because we do not realize we are in the maze at all. Instead, we should feel our way along the invisible borders, as we wind roundabout along our proper path."

Fatalism is no call to inaction, no license for passivity. Even if your maze has a clear path to the finish, you will never find it by merely sitting still. You cannot change the world, but you can - and must - change yourself. The Hindu faith places greater emphasis on an individual's action than perhaps any other religion in the world. Faith governs your life, but ultimately you govern fate.

Belief in absolute destiny would be depressing only if it came from outside. If people saw some external force dominating all their actions, perhaps they would wallow in despondency, but in their view destiny is a power inside our very souls. Faith is the search for the power each of us carries within."

A Lost Leaf ..... A New Beginning ...

Veni ... Vedi... Vici. .... He Came ... He Saw... He Conquered ......

He came after a long time ... a time so long.... a feeling so forgotten ..he brought them all back ... and I never saw them surfacing back in me... I was happy, happy the way I was living ... with no real expectations from life or from love .... I was happily living in my own fantasies and had successfully managed to convince myself that there is no such thing as perfect love ... and no such things as "soul mates" exists .... until that unforgettable night, a night I'll never be able to forget for the rest of my life ... He came and made me realize that once again I was wrong ... wrong in not believing in what really made me who I was ... not believing in LOVE.......How could I not believe in love .. me... who has been always all about love ... just a small thought of being in love would make me fall in love with love .... :-)
I had came back to my home after a long journey from home ... and was staying over my buddy's place for a week .... and on the second day of my stay at her place... we talked ... talked for the first time .... The initial talks were rather funny .. yet they were endless ... and I was given a nick name at the spot ... Chatter Box (...also fondly called by some of my other closed ones)...my very first conversation with him lasted for 6 hours .... we "chatted" while the whole world around us were happily engaged in their own fantasies .. and I had not in my wildest dreams would have ever imagined what I was up against .. :-) As much as I loved talking, so did he and there were no barriers, no boundaries to our conversations ... and a day turned into days ....and I never noticed that my favorite part of the day was the time when we talked.... I would eagerly wait for that time of the day so that we could talk .. Eventually I started realizing that what was happening to me was not very different from my fantasies .. I was falling in love again ...... I was smiling when no one around me was ...... I was humming when everyone was busy working ..... the mornings brought happiness and the evenings were eagerly awaited .. my colleagues started noticing the ever present mysterious smile on my face ... some also said that I was looking more prettier day by day and there was a unmatched glow on my face ... and so did my buddy !!! I loved listening to lovey dovey mushy mushy songs ... and was laughing out loud even on the silliest jokes ... I knew what was happening to me .... I knew where love was taking me ... and I felt it ... I felt different ... for the first time it felt real ... for the first time there was immense intensity in it .. it was gigantic, enormous!! .. It was what I've been waiting for all my life .. I wanted to fly in the deep sea ..... and swim like a free bird in the skies .... everyone tried stopping me from falling for it .. but I was madly in Love with LOVE .... for the first time something felt so real .... as real as the first drop of rain in the desert .... as real as the first drop of morning dew.... but what I ignored to notice was that my reality was short lived like the morning dew and the drop of rain in the desert ... in my madness I forgot to notice that I can never have him and will never come back, even though I felt we were soul mates, we can never be together... forgot to notice that life cannot survive just by dreaming ...life is not a fantasy ...... In less than a week's time a he was returning back home .... and I had not seen him ..... I had to see him .. feel him to realize that he was for real... but that would not have been possible ...... I had to let him go .....let him go back to his own world, his own world of reality ..... where the truth was something else.... I was a fool to think that a fantasy could really come to life ....for once!!!
He is for real..... someone I always wanted to be with .... someone I was waiting for all my life ... someone who completed my mere existence ..... someone who was just so opposite but yet so similar ..... In a short span of time he meant the whole world to me..... my world .. for me he was my shield against struggle, my blanket against the cold times, my strength when I felt weak, my support when I felt was falling ... my reason for existence, he was my source of happiness, and was the definition of love ..... He came... He saw ... He conquered ... all along I was like a dead leaf ... merely living ... until the breeze full love touched her .. and the leaf came to life ... I floated with the breeze where ever it took me ... I followed it blindly ... He meant everything to me ... he is everything to me .... and all I had to offer in return was unconditional love .... that's all I had then..... and that's all I have even now .... One day the breeze stopped and the leaf fell in the middle of the road.... fooled by love .....thought that it came to life ... but never realized that dead things never come back to life .... the leaf had been dead all along ...... but the heart was still beating .... Here I am .... confused like the leaf, my heart still beats but I'm really not living .... my lips still touch my cheeks but I'm not smiling ... I still sleep but I'm not dreaming ..... I want to cry but tears refuse to come out ... I don't know why when I wake up my eyes are swollen and my face is dry... my heart still beats but the pulse is missing .........
I know it's not possible but I Still Believe ....

A Dream Within A Dream .....

A poem that I came across accidentally, but read it again and again... was touched by the melancholic tone which I can so relate to myself ... :-) , so here goes ..

Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.

I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within my hand
Grains of the golden sand
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep,
While I weep - while I weep!
O God! can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?

- Edgar Allan Poe

A FairyTale Fantasy ....

MEANING OF SAAWARIYA

Saawariya means " beloved." But he’s not just any beloved. He’s the dusky, blue tinged (savla) God Krishna who is adored as Saawariya. On a more sublime note, Saawariya is the beloved who is always in love. But not every lover can qualify as Saawariya. Only the lover who stands the test of time…who overcomes all obstacles…who doesn’t care whether he gets the girl or not…as long as he’s consumed by love…as long as he remains in a perpetual state of " being in love … "

That man, that rare lover, is Saawariya.

The fantabulous fantastic all refreshing India Trip...

Well....who said good things don't happen to you... there are always different ways in which happiness bangs your door... my current reason for the happiness is the recent visit to my own country... the place I call my home..and to add cherry to the cake.. it was my cousin's grand wedding that became the main reason for my India trip. I have to admit, I love Indian Weddings...yep, simply love them..... well as long as m not the one who's getting married, but otherwise, all the dances and dholi and mehandi and all these pooja's and rituals that are performed where the entire family sits together, where you never how and where you're day passes by. The talks, big time leg pulling and in a fraction of a second the entire family would be roaring with laughter. The look on everyone's face.. the ever so cute smiles, the lovely hugs (different gestures of expressing love) The uncle's and aunt's, that's too generalised.... nooooo!! chachu's and chachi's .. tayaji's and tauji's...bua's and phophaji's(fufaji's) and mum & dad of course and the most important...all my cousins.. Mostly we all would do things together like preparing for the sangeet, cursing each other, making sure that the arrangements are running in smoothly... eating together in one plate( usually me n my brothers would eat together "ek thali mein khane se pyaar badhta hai...." hee hee). It felt great to go back and spend time with them after 2 long years...The fun part was all that non-stop dancing.... except a few most of us were always ready to dance...more of a rain dance (coz of the rainy season... no other reasons!!) the moto was "Dance 'till you Drop".
To everyone's least expectations I made it to the wedding and surprised everyone with my all time naughty smile....and I can never forget the look on everyone's face when I met each one of them individually...(mostly i made sure that they don't see me at the same time.. :-D) One of my cousins actually thought that he was hallucinating..the cutest of them all....and he walked past me thinking he was crazy and I went back to him asking why he did that... and then he realised that he was not hallucinating.. n I actually was standing in front of him..... :-D
During the wedding it also got me in to thinking that, more like realizing the years that flew by so fast. It seems just like yesterday when we all would play hide n seek or dark room... and today each one of us ready to start our own family... Grown ups eh?? its an overwhelming feeling .. and nostalgic sometimes... and scary too sometimes... but I guess this is something which is inevitable and the only way to let this feeling go away is to have faith and trust.... and loads n loads of love n the feeling that such times will keep on coming.... and the remembrance of the good times we've had... hmmmmmm..... all in about to summarize the trip back to my homeland was simply absofreekin'lutely fantabulous.... it's an excellent way to reboot and a must for a energetic fresh start... we all should do that once in a while... na?? ... :-)

India PHIR Match Har Gayi!!!! Should I be surprised???

Hmmmm....another world cup, another game lost, another disappointment to all those cricket devoted fans; cricket lovers. Anger, Frustration, and Cries. The Indian janta gets all fanatic when it comes to cricket matches. Even sitting miles and miles away from the country I get to listen to all the current commentary of how "The Indian Team" is performing and how they lose!!(Well most of the times). It is so surprising that "The national game, Hockey" gets unacknowledged almost all the time but if Sachin catches cold it becomes a national news. I am not against the cricket fans cause I also happen to be one, but all I am trying to understand is why a game like cricket is always hyped up all the time? Is media and the normal janta responsible for such a lousy performance of Indian team in the World Cup???

Lets analyze a little bit here.... Cricket being a very important game, which relates to the sentiments of so many Indians is no doubt a big time deal. So that makes all the players very important too; but does that mean that the players really deserve that much media attention?? Isn't getting too much media attention giving its adverse effects on their performance at world cup?? Culture overpowered and driven by Vanity, Greed and Money. By giving so much attention and throwing away all the money to the player just to endorse some advertising brand results in a clouded attitude of the players. Well, which... is an undeniable attitude of human nature. Money relates to greed and apathy. Once there is an undisturbed flow of money, cricketers start taking things very easily and distract themselves from the main reason behind their unmatched success and then their center of attention shifts from playing to working on endorsements and building up hotels and restaurants. And the result..... another lousy performance in the match and India looses against some new upcoming team. How sad can this be, breaks heart and hopes hundreds and thousands of Indians. When asked to cricketers about there failure, my God!...do they come up with such impressive and convincing excuses. Media then again comes into play and literally curses the team for not performing well in the match. What if this whole media cycle does not come into play at all? What if they never make them sit on the ninth cloud and then spin their heads and then let them fall straight on the ground!! Will that help India improve in their performance?? I don't know but I do believe that it will definitely help. Hmmmm... what do u think??

Talking about friends.... I've always had a lot of friends, all kinds of friends, friends who I could hang out... friends I would talk to, friends I looked for some kind of emotional support but never had a friend who had all of the above qualities... until now... She is an angel sent exclusively for me and only me.... I never have to think twice before telling her anything about anything and yet I know that she'll completely understand what I am trying to say. She can truly understand my innermost feelings without any kind of explanation required from my side.She can practically read my mind and would then exactly know what I am trying to say. Though its been only a couple of months I became so close to her, it seems I've known her all along. And its not for fact that most of our choices about things are the same, or the fact that both of us are left handed but for the simple reason that she is so adorable and that whenever I meet her all my tensions n troubles are washed away for the amount of time I am with her... her unconditional love as a friend has always been like a blessing.

I kind of share this funny story with her - as she is 2 years elder to me, I say that when god created her , he soon realized that with the nature of her kind, she is going to be alone and then in the same pot he created me, only with a little different physic. And it dint take him long to realize that these two naughty girls shouldnt be together let alone be sisters... so that's how our mothers are different... and then after he broke that pot... and it took us a lot of time for us to meet... well the bottom line of the whole story is there are no words , no sentences that would be enough to say thank you to her and to god who made me become friends with her when I practically had no one to be called as my friend. Thanks bud... You're a Dudani (Dudette) in every sense!!

Life on Fast Track...

Its scientifically proven that in general people spend 1/4 of their lives traveling from one place to the other.... the idea bugged me while I was on my way back to home from college in the early hours of the day..
Mostly I am always in a rush to reach somewhere, reason either I'm late or.... well m usually late so :-D... yet somehow most of the time I manage and make it on time... (now don't ask how I do it... but I uhh do it... ). But this morning on my way back to home.. I was in no rush and just by looking at the traffic I ended up observing it very carefully and I must say it was quite fascinating.. Watching the cars change their lanes and this usually happens in split of a second.... I95 is always loaded with traffic whether its 8:00 AM or 8:00 PM.... someone somewhere is always there on the road... usually in a rush to reach somewhere... and in almost every second two cars end up changing lanes.. and its sooo fascinating to watch them do that.... so swift.... well I must say that one has to be really careful in doing so, cause one small careless mistake can cost lives... but this blog is not about accidents its about the grand design..... it is so captivating... watching a group... almost like a gang of cars running almost at a speed of 80 miles/hr... yet its so amazing the way everything works out... Humans have come a long way.... from walking barefoot to driving these complicatedly integrated mechanical machines....!!!